1. "I'm not afraid of dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb. I also know I'm not blonde."
2. "It costs a lot of money to look this cheap."
3. "I had to get rich so I could afford to sing like I was poor again."
4. "I describe my look as a blend of mother goose, cinderella and the local hooker."
5. "If there's a heaven, I hope to hell I get in."
6. "Some of my dreams are so big they would scare you."
7. "There's a heart beneath these boobs and a brain beneath this wig."
8. "I was the first woman to burn my bra - it took the fire department four days to put it out."
9. "I have little feet because nothing grows in the shade."
10. "If you want to see the rainbow you gotta put up with the rain."
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