1. Don't wear flip flops. I don't care how nice your feet look.
2. Don't say, "You know what I'm saying?" after every sentence.
3. Don't wear socks with sandals.
4. Don't wear skinny jeans and sag them below your a**.
5. Just because you're working out doesn't mean you have the right to wear inappropriate workout attire.
6. Never wear entirely white tennis shoes, unless you have the gout or your slinging school lunches.
7. No tie dye you hippie.
8. Don't wear jeans with bedazzled jewels on the pockets.
9. Find a woman who can dance you under the table. Trust me it's totally worth it.
10. Don't buy faded jeans. Let them wear out naturally.
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