10 Things to Avoid During a First Date Conversation

1. Checking your phone

2. One upping your date

3. Looking over your shoulder

4. Cursing

5. Changing the subject

6. Interrupting

7. Consuming to much alcohol

8. Talking about past relationships

9. Telling your date multiple times how beautiful/handsome they look

10. Comedy club

10 Things That Can Be "Short"

1. Tempers

2. Stacks

3. Circuits

4. y Smalls

5. Cakes

6. Weeks

7. Change

8. Films

9. Term Memory

10. Stories

10 Michael Jackson Videos

1. Thriller

2. Beat it

3. Bad

4. Billy Jean

5. Smooth Criminal

6. Rock with You

7. Don't Stop 'til You Get Enough

8. Remember the Time

9. The Way You Make Me Feel

10. Man in the Mirror

10 Misconceptions Corrected

1. Bats are not blind.

2. Koalas are not bears.

3. Jellyfish are not fish.

4. Polar bears do not eat penguins.

5. Warts are not caused by toads.

6. A duck's quack does echo.

7. If you read in the dark you will not ruin your eyes.

8. It does not take seven years for gum to pass through your digestive system.

9. Ostriches do not hide their heads in the sand.

10. It is not good to be infamous. Infamous means having a very bad reputation.

10 Movies/Videos/TV Shows in which Shaquille O'Neal has Starred or Appeared

1. Kazaam

2. Blue Chips

3. Curb Your Enthusiasm

4. The Parkers

5. My Wife and Kids

6. Johnny Bravo

7. CB4

8. P Diddy's "Bad Boys 4 Life" video

9. Steel

10. Static Shock

10 More Band Names From My Persistent Daughter

1. Snakeskin

2. Underwater Skeletons

3. Indian Ocean

4. Smoke Waves

5. Scales

6. Komodo Park

7. Dragon Tooth

8. Death Tree

9. Smoking Devil

10. Window Pain

10 Celebrities Whose Father's Were Also In Showbiz

1. Angelina Jolie

2. Drew Barrymore

3. Michael Douglas

4. Gyneth Paltrow

5. Sofia Coppola

6. Kate Hudson

7. George Clooney

8. Enrique Iglesias

9. Kiefer Sutherland

10. Charlie Sheen

10 Things That Are "Free"

1. Free bird

2. Freedom

3. Free Willy

4. Free will

5. Free Encyclopedia

6. Free Fallin'

7. Free Ballin'

8. Free for all

9. Free Checking

10. Free samples

The 10 Greatest Robberies of All Time

1. Central Bank of Iraq 2003- The day before the United States bombed Baghdad nearly US$1 billion was stolen from the Central Bank of Iraq.

2. Boston Museum 1990- Two men dressed as police officers, stole $300 Million worth of paintings.

3. Knightsbridge Security Deposit 1987- Two men requested to rent a safe deposit box, then subdued the manager and stole a now worth $111 million.

4. Kent Securitas Depot 2006- The manager was abducted by police impostors, and then $92.5 million was stolen.

5. Great Train Robbery 1963- A 15 gang member stole the US equivalent of $74 million from the Royal Mail's Glasgow to London traveling post office.

6. Banco Central in Brazil 2005- A gang tunneled 255 ft. up to the bank and took $69.8.

7. Northern Bank 2004- Bank officials were threatened and their families were held hostage until they granted access to $50 million dollars to the Northern Ireland Gang.

8. Brinks mat Warehouse 1983- Crooks were granted access to the warehouse thanks to the security guard being the brother-in-law of the gangs mastermind. The gang made off with $45 million worth of gold.

9. Dunbar Armored 1997- A regional safety inspector masterminds a plot to help steal $18.9 million dollars in cash.

10. Lufthansa 1978- Jimmy Burke an associate of the Lucchese crime family masterminded a plan to be carried out by some of his men. The men stole $5.8 million from the Kennedy Airport.

10 Words That Have Recently Been Added to the Scrabble Dictionary

1. Thang

2. Grrl

3. Blingy

4. Facebook

5. Innit

6. Blook

7. Myspace

8. Fansite

9. Darknet

10. Gak &Tik

10 Things I Learned This Weekend 6/20/11

1. There are no friendly snakes.

2. If you chase a snake away from a nest full of baby birds, it will return until it has devoured the prey.

3. Snakes are scarier in the water.

4. People who say that snakes are harmless, have never actually watched a 6 foot rat snake crawl up the side of a cabin, and destroy the lives of two different bird families.

5. The laws of nature suck.

6. All snakes bite.

7. The saying, "They're more scared of you, than you are of them.", is completely untrue.

8. Snakes are not afraid of fire.

9. Minks closely resemble Ferrets.

10. Cream cheese and pork sausage is a delicious combination.

10 Things I Secretly Wish 6/19/11

1. I wish I had a nanny.

2. I wish Vacation Bible School was all summer long.

3. I wish Abby did not work on Saturday.

4. I wish Amelia would make one good choice today.

5. I wish Amelia would quit picking fights with me.

6. I wish Amelia would quit throwing things at me.

7. I wish I had a secret hide out.

8. I wish I was on sabbatical.

9. I wish I could go to summer camp.

10. I wish I could yell, punch, kick, scream, and throw books at people, and still be adorable.

10 Things to Avoid When Drunk

1. Cell Phone

2. Computer

3. Trampoline

4. Electric Cowboy

5. Kroger

6. Sledding

7. Jogging

8. Police

9. Co Workers

10. Driving

10 "Grahams"

1. Graham Parsons

2. Graham Cobb

3. Graham Cracker

4. Paul Graham

5. Billy Graham

6. Alexander Graham Bell

7. Martha Graham

8. Barbara Graham

9. Graham Greene

10. Graham Jarvis

10 Kerby VBS Activities

1. Front yard obstacle course.

2. Wacky Water Romp

3. Homemade Bubble Machine

4. Trampoline Geyser Gush

5. Homemade Porch Popsicles

6. Egg Toss

7. Mermaid Movie

8. Scooter Race

9. Water Balloon Fight

10. Nature Walk

10 Refreshing Summer Time Treats

1. Ice Cream Sandwiches- Bake chocolate cookies. Allow the cookies to completely cool. Then put one scoop of ice cream between two cookies. Place the sandwiches on a tray and place in the freezer for at least two hours. For best results allow sandwiches to freeze overnight.

2. Homemade Ice Cream- No Ice cream maker is required. Get about two pints of strawberries and mash them with a fork or mix them in a blender. In a large bowl combine about two coffee mugs full of half and half, a large can of sweetened condensed milk, 1 cup of heavy cream and 1 tsp of vanilla. Put the ice cream in the freezer for about an hour. When the ice cream is almost completely frozen stir in the strawberries or a fruit of your choice. Enjoy

3. Grilled Peaches- Cut peaches in half. Remove pit. Brush fruit with Canola or Grapeseed oil. Place peaches face down on the grill and cook covered for about five minutes or until grill marks appear. Remove fruit and serve. You may top with ice cream or yogurt.

4. Berry Fool Fools- In medium bowl toss 3 cups of berries with 1/2 cup of sugar, 1 Tbsp. of berry liqueur, and 1 tsp. of lemon juice. Let sit for 20 minutes. Put mixture in a blender and whirl until smooth. In a large bowl beat 1 1/2 cups of heavy cream until soft peaks form. Fold berry mixture into cream. Spoon into bowls and enjoy or freeze for about an hour.

5. Joyce's layered dessert- Get a large bowl and line with a layer of ice cream sandwiches, a layer of cool whip and a layer of Heath bar. Repeat until bowl is full.

6. Pineapple orangesicles- Blend 8 oz. Vanilla yogurt with 8 oz. crushed pineapples and 6 oz. can of  pineapple orange juice concentrate. Blend until smooth. Fill 8 paper drinking cups 1/3 full and freeze for about an hour or until partially frozen. Place wooden popsicle sticks in the middle of each cup. Freeze until completely frozen. About 2 hours.

7. Banana Pudding Ice Cream- Take yourself to Walgreens and buy Banana pudding flavored Bluebell Ice Cream.

8. Karalyn Kerby's Homemade Banana Pudding- Call Karalyn and ask her for the recipe, or ask nicely if she will make a batch for you. It's the greatest banana pudding of all time. Sorry Mom.

9. Lemonade Pie- In a medium bowl, mix 4 cups of softened Vanilla or Lemon Ice cream and 6 oz. can of thawed lemonade concentrate until blended. Immediately spoon into 9" graham cracker pie crust. Freeze for at least 4 hours until firm. Take out of freezer and let it sit for 10  to 15 minutes before cutting.

Rocky Road Sandwiches- Lay out 32 graham cracker squares. Take 1 1/2 cups of chocolate icing and mix with 1 cup of miniature marshmallows in a small bowl. Spread chocolate mixture on half of the crackers. Then take 1 cup of marshmallow creme and spread it on the remaining graham crackers. Next take chocolate ice cream and put half a cup on each chocolate covered graham cracker. Then take the marshmallow covered crackers and complete the sandwich by gently pressing down on top of the ice cream covered crackers. Wrap each sandwich in plastic wrap and freeze until firm. 3 1/2 to 4 hours.

10 Reasons Bella Thinks I Don't Like Canoeing

1.I have to paddle.

2. It's too slow.

3. I'm afraid we're always going to tump.

4. I'm scared of snakes.

5. When we hit shallow water with rocks it hurts my butt.

6. It also involves hiking.

7. We didn't pack enough snacks.

8. Abby had to ride in the back of the canoe so she could have total control.

9. Amelia cried the entire way.

10. I got sunburned.

10 Reasons You Wish You Could Go Camping with Me

1. Homemade Ice cream made from evaporated milk and root beer.

2. Extreme Bocce Ball

3. I serve Mimosas with breakfast every morning.

4. I will paddle and steer the canoe while you sleep.

5. If you get tired, I will carry you back to the campsite.

6. I can build a good campfire.

7. I will remind you to reapply your sunscreen.

8. If we go on a long hike, I will stop and wait if you get tired.

9. I like to fish. If the fish aren't biting, I will drop puns until your ears are tired.

10. I bring my own beer, so we don't have drink 3% Oklahoma beer.

10 Bad Ass Water Parks (Just Drive South)

1. Schlitterbahn New Braunfels

2. Wet-n-Wild Waterworld (El Paso)

3. Splashtown USA (San Antonio)

4. Schlitterbahn Beach (South Padre)

5. Lost Lagoon (at Seaworld San Antonio)

6. Schlitterbahn (Galveston)

7. Splash Kingdom (Canton)

8. Burger's Lake (Ft. Worth)

9. Splashtown Houston

10. Great Wolf Lodge (Grapevine)

10 Disney Movies in Which the Mother is Not Dead (This List is for Deb)

1. Lady and the Tramp

2. Hercules

3. Mary Poppins

4. Lion King

5. Sleeping Beauty

6. Mulan

7. Peter Pan

8. 101 Dalmations

9. Aristocats

10. Toy Story

10 Disney Movies in Which the Mother is Dead or Nonexistent

1. Bambi

2. Finding Nemo

3. Cinderella

4. Little Mermaid

5. Beauty and the Beast

6. The Jungle Book

7. The Fox and the Hound

8. Pochahontas

9. Tarzan

10. Aladdin

10 Reasons I'm More Country Than You

1. I have cousins named Troy, Joy, and Roy.

2.  My Aunt and Uncle had a house that consisted of two separate houses fused together.

3. If I see an animal that looks dead in my yard, I will usually poke it with a stick.

4. I have an aunt who says, "It takes a tough woman to swallow some snuff."

5. I learned to swim when I was two. My grandma wrapped me in a towel, threw me in the water, and said, "If he comes up he can swim. If he don't... he can't."

6. I have been accidentally burned by a cigarette on more than one occasion.

7. I've used a relatives' cigarette to light firecrackers on the Fourth of July.

8. I grew up without Tornado Sirens.

9. My parents went to High School in Farmersville, Texas. Their mascot was the Farmersville Fighting Farmers.

10. I would rather pee outside, even if it is more convenient to pee inside.

10 Underrated Actors

1. Ray Liotta

2. Jason Bateman

3. Danny Trejo

4. Giovanni Rabisi

5. James Spader

6. Ed Harris

7. Mickey Rourke

8. Ben Foster

9. Don Cheadle

10. Chris Cooper

10 Cars That Did Not Live Up To Company Expectations

1. Skoda

2. Yugo

3. Lada

4. Daewoo Matiz

5. Flat Cinquecinto

6. 1981-1982 DeLorean DMC 12

7. Ford Edsel

8. Plymouth Prowler

9. Cadillac Catera

10. Trabant

10 Things to Remember if You See me this Morning

1. Don't touch me!

2. Don't talk to me!

3. Don't look at me!

4. Don't tell me, "It's hot."

5. Don't let me catch you filling up your huge thermos of coffee, before I've gotten my first cup.

6. I don't feel like trying something new today.

7. Don't wave at me to turn, like I'm the idiot who doesn't know that they have the right of way.

8. Don't ask me if I want a donut. "I don't eat donuts. How do you think I keep this girlish figure? I'm hypoglycemic. Do you have any apple fritters?"

9. Don't ask me about my weekend.

10. Don't say, "It's not the heat, it's the humidity."

10 Things I will Hear This Week While Working at School

1. I can't believe we still have to come to school.

2. I don't know why we're here. We're not doing anything.

3. The kids act like they're already out.

4. You got big plans this summer?

5. It's too hot to still be going to school.

6. Those snow days sure were nice, but we're paying for it now.

7. We shouldn't have to come after Memorial Day.

8. It's gonna be a hot summer.

9. Can I be captain?

10. A lot of school's are already out. Why do we have to go so long?

10 Things it's Hotter than According to my Uncle Tom

1. "It's hotter than a Mother F***er."

2. "It's hotter than a Son of a B**ch."

3. "It's hotter than a whore on the Fourth of July."

4. "It's hotter than Hell."

5. "It's hotter than two squirrels f****ing in a wool sock."

6. "It's hotter than a two dollar pistol."

7. "It's hotter than shit."

8. "It's hotter than a whore at church."

9. "It's hotter than a half bred fox in a forest fire."

10. "It's hotter than Georgia Asphalt."

10 Quotes to Solidify my Dolly Parton Crush

1. "I'm not afraid of dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb. I also know I'm not blonde."

2. "It costs a lot of money to look this cheap."

3. "I had to get rich so I could afford to sing like I was poor again."

4. "I describe my look as a blend of mother goose, cinderella and the local hooker."

5. "If there's a heaven, I hope to hell I get in."

6. "Some of my dreams are so big they would scare you."

7. "There's a heart beneath these boobs and a brain beneath this wig."

8. "I was the first woman to burn my bra - it took the fire department four days to put it out."

9. "I have little feet because nothing grows in the shade."

10. "If you want to see the rainbow you gotta put up with the rain."

10 Wrestling Tag Teams from the 1980's

1. Road Warriors

2. Demolition

3. Rock n' Roll Express

4. British Bulldogs

5. The Midnight Express

6. The Fabulous Freebirds

7. Hart Foundation

8. The Mega Powers (Hulk Hogan and Macho Man with Miss Elizabeth)

9. Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff

10. The Killer Bees

10 Poorly Named Products (Some of which can be found at your local Asian Grocer)

1. Tasty Diabetes (Sugar free Chocolates)

2. Pork Joy (Leather work gloves)

3. i Pad

4. PouPee (Press on Nails)

5. Vergina Imported Beer

6. Cock Flavored Soup Mix

7. Batter Blaster

8. Plopp Candy Bars

9.Twinkle Shoot (Cat Tunnel)

10. Easy Off Stripper (Paint Remover)