1. "It takes a tough woman to swallow some snuff."
2. "Al Gore never went to college, but he did invent the internet."
3. "How tacky. They don't even have a Wal-Mart in this town."
4. "If I were to get a job, and save a hundred dollars, and give it to your mother."
5. "Ya'll want some of this stew? I made a big pot, but B.T. won't touch the stuff."
6. "Ain't nobody told you sideburns was out of style? Well they're crooked."
7. "I got pulled over for a DWU. Driving While Ugly."
8. "I love you. I really do. I love you."
9. "You know you're not adopted. If we had the choice we would not have picked you."
10. "Joy to the World 'cause we don't want her."
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